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Every day we have choices. Choices to be a victim or to be a survivor! Victim thoughts - "Why does this always happen to me?" and "no-one else understands what this is like." Sure, life brings about frustrating situations and these thoughts give us an opportunity to have an important discussion with ourselves. Take time to feel the situation because those feelings are real! Then consider taking an opposite position as a Survivor!

To become a survivor, we need to think like a problem solver and ask ourselves questions like what do I want? and what steps can I take to get what I want? How long before I can exit this situation? Perhaps engaging another person to help in this process would be helpful.

Simple, right? This is one role we play and there are more that will be revealed. The first step of trying on a new habit is awareness. Awareness is my favorite word because without awareness, we do not have a starting point. Just start!

To see more on the roles we integrate into our relationships, visit The Drama Triangle with Lauren Kress found at

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I keep hearing "I can't wait until this is all over" or "I am so sick of this." Since we have no idea when solutions to the situations will occur, it is time to start LIVING! What does that look like you say?

Go for a walk, ride that bike, phone an old friend, sit on your patio and do nothing.

Job loss? Volunteer in different areas that may create networking opportunities for your next job. Perhaps your next job will be your best job yet. The problem happens when we give up or wait for someone else to come save us. When we sit and blame the world for out situations, our only option is to change directions.

No, this is not easy and it is not fun and I miss many of the enjoyments I had such as summer concerts. Feel the feelings of sadness for a minute when it is necessary because at times, it is necessary! Then adjust your sails and reach out to someone you may not know and offer support. Smile rather than frown. Laugh rather than cry. Sing rather than yell. Dance rather than sit. LIVE!

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